Doug Lansky
Posted 3 Sep 2012
Posted 4 Oct 2011
Taste the Freedom of Brandenburg-Gate-Shaped Pasta
Feel the rush of Cold War carbohydrates running through your colander as you prepare your Brandenberg-Gate-Shaped pasta.
0 stars
Posted 14 Jun 2011
Let Everyone Know Your Feet Have Been To Bermuda
You don’t want to wear one of those in-your-face, look-at-me-I’ve-been-to-Bermuda T-shirts. You have to be more subtle about it. These Bermuda socks offer just the right amount of travel boasting. When you’re sitting, show at little ...READ MORE
1 like
Posted 13 Jun 2011
Plate Clock Tells You When to Eat and When to Look At Touristy Shit
It’s 3 o’clock so it must be time to look the Tower of London. See how easy it is! Forget the guidebook and grab some cutlery and enjoy every minute of your London plate clock.
2 likes
Posted 9 Jun 2011
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Blue Koosh Ball Bird Loves Sweden
Love is contagious. Especially when you stare into the big, soul-searching, rubbery eyes of a blue bird-shaped koosh ball.
6 likes
Posted 6 May 2011
Bulgarian Fiddle Clock Guarantees Not to Annoy You With Bulgarian Folk Music
Okay, so maybe you can’t play the six-stringed Gadulka, but you can use it to tell time! And with just a mild ticking sound, it is 99% less annoying than the non-clock version.
11 likes
Posted 2 May 2011
Executive Toad Coin Purse
Show off your financial acumen by keeping your coins in this refined and practical Cane Toad Purse.
50 likes
Posted 28 Apr 2011
Japanese Golden Poo Brings Good Luck and Reminds You of Soft-Serve Ice Cream
You can happily stare for hours at this perfectly sculpted golden piece of poo on a red silk pillow. Makes a great centerpiece for your dining table. (Note: yes, this is an actual souvenir and yes, it is a gold-plated poop. It’s good luck in Japan ...READ MORE
42 likes
Posted 28 Apr 2011
Royal Wedding Bear with Ring Will Make You Cry with Love
Okay, you’re beginning to realize that Prince William is not going to marry you. But all is not lost! You can have the next best thing: William the Bear. And it comes with the ring that Kate might be wearing if she weren’t already getting ...READ MORE
26 likes
Posted 27 Apr 2011
Royal Wedding Toy Set
Hey Kids! Just imagine marrying into the Royal Family and getting pursued by paparazzi for the rest of your life. Or hanging out in Buckingham palace drinking gin and tonics with the Queen. The royal fun is as limitless as your imagination.
34 likes
Posted 27 Apr 2011
Princess Kate Thimbles — One For Every Digit!
Imagine sewing a patch on your jeans with a different Princess Kate thimble on each digit! Or just being able to use a different one Monday to Friday! What a feeling!
17 likes
Posted 18 Apr 2011
Posted 15 Apr 2011
Ladies and Gentlemen, Her Majesty’s Beefeater Ducks!
Beefeater guards protect the Tower of London and Crown Jewels, but who do you think protects th e moat? The Beefeater ducks, that’s who! A highly trained and respected brigade of webbed-foot soldiers.
28 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Traditional Academic Back Scratcher
This traditional University of Wisconsin back scratcher will satisfy any academic itch up to PhD level. It can also be used for waving to friends across campus, petting badgers, and shaking hands with people you’d rather not touch.
14 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Presto! You’re Certified. Start tipping!
As any self-respecting cow tipper knows, the toughest part is nailing down that certification. Instead of waiting for months for the paperwork to be processed, you can now pick up this handy coffee mug.
21 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Unsigned Plate-Like Framed Photo
Didn’t get a personal invite to the Royal Wedding? Here’s the next best thing: an unsigned photo of the royal couple encased in a light-weight frame with no less than 20 London attractions interlaced into an architectural dreadlock.
15 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Own the Very Same Framed Photo the Royal Couple Has on Their Wall
You can almost imagine the vow: ”I love you as much as all the framed Union Jack-patterned, heart-shaped royal seals with faux-silver London miniature attractions in the whole world.”
17 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
His and Hers British Police dogs!
Can’t decide which to get… get both! They’re police partners. Place them in front of your home and keep thieves at bay. Have been proven more effective than at least one high-priced security system.
16 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Tube Map for Binge Drinking Tourists
Drink yourself into oblivion with this shot glass, pass out on the London Underground, wake up hours later and use that same shot glass to find your way back home. Perfect for the visiting binge drinker!
28 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Almost-Vintage Guitars Guarantee Amazing British Rock Sound
Command instant respect at your next rock concert with one of these genuine kick-ass British electric guitars. So hard core, you’ll risk getting mistaken for Keith Richards, Pete Townsend, or maybe Eric Clapton… but that’s just a c ...READ MORE
6 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Three-Foot Tall British Phone Booth!
Bring home an adorable three-foot-tall red British phone booth that is guaranteed not to work. It’s too small for children to play in, but you can fill it with all sorts of crap just like we did.
17 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
London’s Clock Tower as Envisioned by Donald Trump
Bet you didn’t know London’s famous Clock Tower was make of solid fake gold? Place this shiny almost-exact replica on your mantle and bring back those fond memories of you posing in front of the real thing.
15 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Everything You Already Know About The Royal Couple Packaged in a Whole New Way
Get the full fairy tale love story on William and Catherine… complete with DVD! It covers how they met, got engaged, spent a few hundred million on a wedding, and were chased by paparazzi ever after.
7 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Can You Believe the Leaning Tower of Pisa is This Cheap?!!
Try to spot the real Leaning Tower of Pisa. They’re all so life-like and beautifully crafted it’s almost impossible!
20 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Have You Ever Seen a Rat This Fucking Adorable?
Hey, look, a rat on a Vespa is stealing the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Just kidding, it’s only a magnet. Funny joke!
7 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
The 4-Teat Coffee Mug
You’ll never forget to add milk when you start your day with a perfectly balanced 4-teat cup of coffee or tea. Udder bliss!
26 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Pisa… You Know, That Place Where Popeye Hangs Out
Celebrate this Italian wonder with an authentic Popeye-and-Olive-on-a-scooter T-shirt. The cartoon couple were well-known supporters of Italian architecture.
19 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Relaxation Bag Will Help You Find Your Inner Serenity
Take one look at this tote bag and waves of relaxation will instantly wash over you and lull you into a state of sedated Milwaukee bliss. Now carry it around and let others benefit from its powerful relaxation powers.
8 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Milwaukee, The Rainbow Peace Capital of the Midwest
Missed the whole hippie movement? It’s not too late. Grab this rainbow peace magnet (comes decorated with three geminoids and the word ”Milwaukee”), download some Grateful Dead tunes and start making up for lost time. It’s th ...READ MORE
12 likes
Posted 10 Apr 2011
Cheese Bell Is Perfect for All Cheese-Related Occasions
Your cheese is aged to perfection and ready to serve, but how will you let your guests know it’s time to eat? With this handy cheese bell, that’s how! That smug little mouse makes a perfect grip. Just ring a few time and your cheese-lovin ...READ MORE
11 likes
Ah… to be a moose in Sweden